Soliloki

Prosaic soliloquies performed by a quixotic person

Posts Tagged ‘multi-tasking

A Doubting Thomas, I Am

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‘Can I do this? Should I change direction midstream? Can it work? Will it work? What should I do?’

That’s my thought on school and work.

Doubts can be lethal. They start as an insignificant idea that passes through your mind like the wind. This is when a tiny seed of doubt is planted in your head. Then, it starts to grow. Rapidly. Dangerously. Next thing we know, it evolves into a gigantic stalk of doubts that keeps on growing within your brain and heart until you give in to it. A white flag is raised. You lost. Game over.

I’m doubting myself and I’ve a bad feeling that this is what will happen to me. Naʿūḏubillāh.

Stepping into the second year as a student, I’m starting to wonder if I made the right decision to get a higher academic degree. I even wonder if I should continue going into this direction, career-wise.

You see, being a person who is at high risk for dyslexia (that’s another story to tell) and has a short attention span (I suspect ADD, but for all I know, it may only be--oh, look, a squirrel!), learning and working within an orthodox atmosphere doesn’t come easy. And what more to say of doing them both simultaneously. If it weren’t for the love of knowledge, I’d probably not be here in one piece, intellectually and psychologically. It’s a good thing, too, that I’m a very curious person, by nature. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but it’s been a great help to me. However, having a full-time demanding job and being a student at the same time is tough. Oh, I’m a good multi-tasker, believe you me. Still, juggling work and school gives a whole new perspective to multi-tasking--it’s akin to juggling two humongous boulders whilst walking along on a very thin rope. Imagine that. It ain’t easy. Sure, handling work and school at the same time isn’t impossible, but it sure ain’t no walk in the park (for me, at least).

It does seem easy to say, ‘I should stop doubting, and start doing and striving.’ Too bad, talking is more convenient than actually doing. That’s why giving out advices and critics to someone who’s in a predicament feels effortless. And what if the situation were reversed? We’d feel completely clueless and helpless. Theories are easier than practical applications.

Having said that, I’m eternally grateful for my life. Šukrān lillāhi taʾāla.

In case you’re wondering, no, I still don’t have the answers.

Written by SZA

26 February 2012 at 10:11 PM

The Kick-off

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[Photo: My newly-acquired books, A Tale of Two Cities and The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn]

I was pondering what to have for lunch today when I was *ding!* struck by an idea to find a copy of The Grapes of Wrath at The Spring’s MPH bookshop during my lunch break. A brilliant idea it was, because I could finally get a good reading-starter for my book campaign and at the same time buy my lunch and get out of the humdrum office for a moment. So drove to The Spring, I did. Alas, the journey from the office to the mall and back to the office wasn’t like a walk in the park. It was a hardship. Almost.

You see, going out for a shopping and a lunch during the peak period needs a comprehensive plan ahead of time. You need to think of which road shortcuts to use so you would not get caught in the heavy traffic; where to head to first once you are in the mall so you would not feel all confused and hassled; and how much time to be allocated for book-shopping, eating lunch and driving to and fro between the office and the mall so you could eventually return to the office in good time. Gotta plan the whole lot, you know. But I’m not a planner by nature, and Spontaneity is the name of the blood that runs through my veins. I make up plans as I go. That’s my modus operandi. Surprisingly, even without any plan today, I still managed just fine (barely) when battling through the traffic, finding a good parking spot, looking for a book, buying a lunch, enduring the traffic again when returning back to the office, AND gobbling KFC’s Cheesy Potato Wedges down my throat while steering the wheel with one hand (oh, how I wished the world had witnessed this--the art of multi-tasking at its finest). All that in ten minutes. OK, five times of ten minutes, to be exact. But hey, still not bad for a spur-of-the-moment shopping record, oui?

Yes, it was a grand adventure today; only too bad that I couldn’t find a single copy of that book written by John Steinbeck. Good news was, I did found RM9.90-a-piece HarperCollins books in the Classic section when I was on the verge of leaving the bookshop. Boy, nothing caught my eyes like those under-RM10 books did. I grabbed two of those straight away. ‘Grabbed’ being the operative word since the price was oh-so-pocket-friendly-la-di-da (that’s just as well since I need to monitor my personal economic health very closely) and besides, I was very intent on getting out of the bookshop with at least a book in my hand (after paying, of course).

And now, I’m happy to announce that my book campaign has officially kicked-off.

Written by SZA

5 January 2011 at 10:34 PM